Cure for Insecure

               Sometimes, I get insecure, and I know that everyone does. As what Yanna said, " there will always be someone worse or better than you". Super agree! I'm just thankful to Jah that I'm able and fit. Just need to learn to take care, admire and love myself.

            Be HAPPY! :D THROW AWAY ALL THE INSECURITIES AND LOVE. LOVE. LOVE.

I MISS YOU

DEAR

 

   I cherished every moment that we've been together. Even though we don't have a complete and happy family, I am thankful that I have healthy relationship with you. I hope we'll have good times this year. I am so excited for you to come home :)



DEAR
 

  You are the two responsible uncles that I'm very proud to have. I am so lucky to have you as my loving and caring mentors. I know that you are both doing your best to make money for your families. Hope to see you soon.



DEAR

 

  I really miss you guys. First of all, I want to thank you uncle Kermit and tita Elvi for your unconditional love and support. You both stand as my father and mother. You are always present in my graduation since elementary. You don't fail to make me feel happy all the time. I also want to thank you for bringing Justan in this world. I am so happy to have Justan as my cousin.
 Uncle Kermit, I hope you're feeling better right now. I've heard that you are experiencing some serious headaches. Get well soon and take care of your health. Oops! I want to inform you, I still don't have squizzes :D

<3 Love you all.
from dear angel

12-21-2012? Is it the end of the world?

    Okay guys, it's 2012. Heard something special this year? who doesn't know? This year is predicted to be the end of the world specifically, 12-21-2012. Many believed on this prophecy and they fear that our lives will totally end up on this date. How can we assure that this is true? First of all, let's ask ourselves, "WILL THIS HAPPEN?SERIOUSLY?". If it will, what will we do?

     No need to panic guys. All of these things don't give assurance at all. They are not God to tell when will be the end of the world. According to Matthew 24:36, "Concerning that day and hour that nobody knows, neither the angels of the heavens nor the Son, but only the Father." It is clear in the book of Matthew that only God, the Father knows the exact day and hour of the judgement day. Even Jesus, his Son doesn't know when. How come people make prophecies like this? Now, we all know that we cannot assure when will it really be. Maybe, it will be later, tomorrow,next week, next month, next year? In short, we absolutely don't know. Just like a thief, judgement day will come without our knowledge. The thief will not tell the householder when will he come, unless if the thief is out of his mind. 

    Why did God didn't tell us when will be the judgement day? Logically, if he did, people will depend and will not act responsibly and accordingly. For example, God said that it will be on January 1,2013. So it will be a year later. People may think that," Well, I still have 12 months. I can do stupid things for a short time. Then, I will serve God 3 months before the exact date." Sound weird, right? People will serve God without sincerity. They will just do it because of the price- the salvation. God wants us to serve Him unconditionally and willingly, not because of our self concerns. Judgement day(Armageddon) is God's war to end the wickedness. Therefore, it is not His intention to kill all humankind, instead He wants us all to be saved and have the everlasting life in the paradise.

     To enjoy God's promises, we need to do something. As what others say, No Pain No Gain. We need to give in order to receive. Let's read John 17:3," This means everlasting life, their getting in of knowledge of you, the only true God, and of one whom you sent forth, Jesus Christ". That's all we need, get to know the One  True God and his only begotten Son, Jesus Christ.It is clear here that God and Jesus Christ are of different persona. This fact is what most people get confused with. They thought that God and Jesus are One. According to Matthew 16:15-16," He said to them: You, though, who do you say I am? In answer Simon Peter said:" You are the Christ, the Son of the living God". Peter clearly stated that Jesus Christ is the SON OF THE LIVING GOD. Therefore, who is the One and True God?  Psalms 83:18 says," That people may know that you, whose name is Jehovah, You alone are the Most high over all the Earth." God has a personal name,  and is introduced to us as Jehovah. It is one good thing to know God's name as part of getting in of knowledge about Him.

      Start today, not tomorrow, not next year because we know that Jesus Christ is coming. Many prophecies in the bible are happening in the present days.( Try to read 2 Timothy 3:1-5 ; Luke 21:11 ; Mark 13:8 ; Revelation 11:18 ; Matthew 24:14). Jesus taught us to pray in a manner showed in Matthew 6:9 ( the Our Father prayer). Most of us are asking for the God's kingdom to come, and we can assure that it will come because Titus 1:3 says that God cannot lie.

      Upon knowing all these things, it is better for us to prepare ourselves. Whether we're ready or not, God's kingdom is coming real soon. According to Matthew 24:44, " On this account, you too prove yourselves ready, because at an hour that you do not think to be it, the Son of man is coming."

   Being one of the Jehovah's witnesses is both a privilege and a challenge for me. It's a privilege because I was given an opportunity to serve Jehovah and seek His righteousness. I was introduced to the teachings of bible since I was a little kid. In the other hand, it's a challenge because most of my classmates and friends make fun of it sometimes. They used to call me "hoi Jehovah" instead of my name. But this doesn't bother me much because I know that they don't mean those things, and they just want to have some fun. 

    I've been through many challenges especially in school. My teachers always question our beliefs,(we do not sing along during national anthem, we do not join any competitions and we refrain from getting involve in politics) but still they respect those. It took a lot of courage to defend your stand in front of them, and I'm tankful that I did it. Now that I am in tertiary, I will do my best to stay on the standards of God and be aware of the temptations of the world. I hope as this year ends, all things will be great. I want to face 2012 with clear goals and plans. I want to make most of my life fruitful by serving God. Solomon wrote in Ecclesiastes 12:1 that we should remember our Grand Creator in the days of our young manhood. As youth, I have now my strength and time to do good things and serve our Creator. 

look at me now :) oh! im getting papers.

:(

Why does it need to happen? I'm depressed. Super depressed. The highest state of depression, shall I say. I dont know, this is me. I keep my problems with myself always. It's hard for me to open up with anybody else. It's hard for me to express and share it. All that I can do is to lay and cry on my pillow. I can even hardly talk, smile and do something. Here I am, looking at the distant with a blank face. Who can help me? My family?no. My mother and father are not on my side. My friends?they are the ones whom I have conflict with. How about my other friends? they could be but i cant.
         I dont want to go to school this week but I'm thinking about my grades. If i will do that, I'm just adding more problems to my life. ................ What will I do to make me feel better?

The end is near

        The world is full of many enjoyable things..We almost spend all our time for the recreations and our motto in life seems to be "Live your life to the fullest". Do you think that's the right thing to do this time?They said life is too short, so enjoy it. But that perception is only for those who dont know the kingdom of God. They dont know that eternal life exist.
      I can really feel that the end is near. A lot of signs are appearing. So what should we do now?will we ignore all of these or will we make actions to have our salvation?If we will forget and ignore to serve God, for sure, God will also ignore and forget us during the judgement day..God wants us to be saved, if and only if, we want it too.
   

What's the best future we can have?

       Many of us enrolled in the prestigious and excellent universities and entered on our respective courses...we do all of these because of the reason "I want to have the best future for me and my family"..no doubt,life now is getting harder and harder..food prices are hiking,gas prices are hiking,bills are hiking,everything is hiking..on my part, i can hardly imagine what my future brings..i dont have any idea how high prices are 10 or more years from now...As one of the Jehovah's witnesses, the best future that one can have is the God's kingdom..and that's we've been asking on our prayer for years based on matthew 6:9-13"You must pray then,this way: "Our Father in the heavens,let your name be sanctifed .Let your kingdom come .Let your will take place,as in heaven, also upon earth.Give us today our bread for this day; and forgive us our debts,as we also have forgiven our debtors. And do not bring us into temptation but deliver us from the wicked one." In this prayer, we mentioned in the first sentence that we shall sanctify the name of God. But how can we sanctify the name of God if we dont know His name?If you were asked, what's the name of our God?

       For sure,many will answer Jesus Christ..And that's the confusion of many..The name of God is intoduced in Psalms 83:18, " That people may know that you, whose name is Jehovah, You alone are the most high over all the Earth". It is clear in the verse that the name of our one true God is Jehovah".(Let's discuss the origin,translation and evrything about the name og God on my other blogposts). If we read revelation 8:1, "I am the Alpha and the Omega, says Jehovah God, "the one who is and who was and is coming the Almighty.".Therefore, God is the Alpha and the Omega, which means that God has no beggining nor end. But the Colossians says,"He is the image of the invisible God, the firstborn of all the creation." It is stated that Jesus Christ was the first creation or in other words he was created. Even on the existence of Jesus Christ here on Earth, he preached all the time about His Father..he humble himself under his Father in the heavens..

      I am not against Jesus,never in my whole life..I just want to explain the confusion about God and Jesus Christ..Jesus is our Saviour,he saved us from our sin..In fact,we need to praise our one true God and Jesus Christ.and if we do that, we can have the best gift ever, "the everlasting life"..John 17:3 says," This means everlasting life, their takig in knowledge of you, the only true God, and one of the one whom you sent forth, Jesus Christ." The word of God, bible promised us that we can have the everlasting life and God never broke His promises. This is the only thing that we can assure inspite of the problems and challenges of life..:)Who doesn't want to have everlasting life?

*********

i dont know when is the right time to be in love......well, it's too early to talk about LOVE...but im hoping that i wont fall in love this time..i dont want to expect and to be hurt...im not also assuring this thing because everything is unpredictable...they might come on the time that we dont expect the most...i just hope that mr. right will come when im already prepared...

misshu

i've been feeling this for days..i miss my classmates and my close friends..i want to have a chat with them for hours...i cant imagine that we'll be apart and we'll have different lives sooner...i hope our friendship will be even stronger..i dont know why i feel jealous right now, imagining that they'll have their new bff's..:(...i hope,i hope, i hope, they will be no "ilangan" between us..

hungry of hk?

for sure she is...SO DO I..

quirky things that i get from you

PAULINE- When i take a bath, i put my falling hair on the walls or tiles of the bathroom.

SHARA- It's okay to shout and scream when i get "kilig".

APPLE- It's not weird to be a super organized person?.It helped a lot.

SHIRLY- Singing in out of tune is fun.(i had the cool version of heal the world..hehe)

JEAH- Talking with actions is pretty.

JANINE- Laughing hard or what we called "bungisngis" is not bad at all.

LEO- Dancing ballet and all those weird stuffs can make you special.

PRINCESS- Dont bowel for three weeks and it cant poison you...

smile:D

I used to smile without showing my teeth..luckily,,i found this picture with my teeth on..I had my :p (bleeh) moment..I looked like a kid that had her first balloon...

I miss Josh:"(

      I watched aj perez' episodes of his old tv show "all about ur luv" on the youtube..he was team up with lauren young as nelle..they are so cute together and i missed those moments...i really miss aj even though i dont know him...I just realize his goodness after he died...one can really appreciate someone when he's gone...I hope he stayed longer here on earth..but everyone of us will face death..it just happened that he faced it early..he's a nice kid and God has a good reason why he's gone..:)..

      I really cried hard when i heard about his death..I looked like crazy that time,crying for someone i didnt know...it just proved that he's a one of a kind person...Steph Ayson is so lucky to have him...

tamaraw,here I come!

       Last year,I took an entrance examination in University of the Philippines(UP) and University of Sto. Tomas(UST)..luckily,I was qualified...This vacation, I took another examination in CEU with pauline and we also did pass. I also plan to take an exam in Trinity University of Asia, San Beda College, SFU and St.Scholastica...But my laziness stop me to do it..I was really confuse what university to be in..Today,I took an exam in Far Eastern University(FEU) and I was so happy that i successfully made it...I was pretty settle in FEU and I'm hoping that I'll have a fruitful stay in the university.

      I regretted that I didnt have a settle and clear plans about my college that made me so confused and nuts...But I'm very thankful now that I'm finally settled..I was also given a merit to acquire scholarship..At least,in this way i can help my parents in financial matters.:)

cute cupid:)

          Last tuesday,I and mama went to feu for the schedule of my exam..we went to the lobby for application..i was so star strucked with the guy who was one of the in-charge..I think he's chinese or korean..He has a fair skin and a cute eyes(very very pretty eyes).His co-worker complimented him that he's so blooming.he didnt understand what the word "blooming" is.hehe.how cute!.I can be his interpreter.joke..the other guy explained that he looks fresh and glowing.then he cracked a charming smile..I cant help but stare at him..hehe..he's a heartmelter<3
         I gave him my two i.d pictures to fulfill the requirements.(I was so embarassed when I gave it because that's the worst picture i have). he called me again for the schedule of my exam..he asked me what day and time I would like to take the CAT,,and I replied,"tomorrow po,8 am". I was blushing that time and i hope he didnt notice it..I dont know what happened to me but I was smiling the whole time..:))
       Today,I took my exam for three hours..when we were on our way home, I saw him again at the lobby..My heart pumped hard and I was again turned on blushing...My day felt complete upon seeing him..i told mama about my crush thing on him..she said that last tuesday,,the guy stared at me twice while clipping my i.d pictures...I'm still bothered that he noticed how ugly my pictures are..hahai..I really hope he didnt..
      I'm so excited to start my college life...I have a new school,new environment,and a new INSPIRATION..hehe:")

voice lesson 101

     I wanted to have a voice lesson this summer to improve my vocals...I didnt tell my mama about it yet,so I searched a voice lesson in the youtube. I found a good voice coach. Her first concern is the breathing. She said that breathing should be in this way: "inhale-stomach out/exhale-stomach in". It was frustating at first because it's not the usual way...Most of the breathing exercise is "inhale-stomach in/exhale-stomach out"..
    I just find this thing weird..:))))try it...

Cats and dogs < Lolo and lola

 Cats and dogs are known to be rivals..But their quarrel is nothing compared to my lolo-lola's quarrel.. They are really unstoppable. I think I need to call for a police to make them stop. Our house will set on fire when their brains ignite..they cannot control their temper..I think it's a sign of aging..right?hehe

daydreaming

One thing that makes me smile is daydreaming..i regularly change my desktop background..My desktop backgrounds are usually sceneries, architecture designs, nature and wonderful places. before sleeping, I used to look at it, close my eyes, and imagine that im in it..its really true..They are my happy thoughts....it truly makes me smile.

did you ever?

Did you ever experience to sleep and feel that your eyelids are covering up your sight.?One night, I lay down on my bed to sleep from a very long and wary day. when I close my eyes after praying, I can imagine myself that my eyelids are covering up my pupils that enable my eyes to see. It's a really weird feelin. I can bearly breath that time so I open my eyes immediately. Who's with me? if you are,close your eyes. hehe.:)

just face everything with a smile:):)

     I'm just a 15-year old girl, and I know it's awkward to blog this topic. but I just want to express some things that I've learned from my experience.. Someone courted me for about a year. He's not really consistent, that's why I feel that he's not genuine. His text messages are full of cheezy thoughts(which are not necessary to make me feel special). All I need to hear is his true and sincere cogitation. lately, I discovered that he already had a girlfriend..I was on the "what shall I do" situation on that moment..

     I know that I dont have the right to get angry of him because i dont owe him at all..But i was really upset upon knowing that he did a little game on me. I was not worthy of that. .Before anything else, I confronted him.. He told me that they're not with each other anymore and that I'm the reason why he built a relationship with her. It's hard to trust and believe on him that moment..It's also unfair in both parties.All that's on my mind is to keep distance..That's the best thing I think I could do.

     My favorite concept in life is "everything happens for a reason".We may not understand or find the reason immediately,but I am certain that it has.. I'm a kind of person who trust people easily.. And this learning experience taught me to be cautious and to be paranoid sometimes. I always wanted in my life to please everybody, that it came to the point that I'm able to do everything nice to them..I've learned not to do that to all..Not everyone is worthy enough for that..

    For now, I cut off all our contacts and I promise not to bother him anymore. I wanted to rectify the situation but I choose to remain silent..I dont have idea on the nature of their relationship and I dont want to make a scene..Besides,my words wouldnt mean that much...All I wanted for now is to give them peace of mind and to give myself a peace of mind too..

     I didnt regret meeting him at all..he inspired me somehow..and made me a better one,,a more grown up girl..I also didnt want to make any negative impression on himself..Nobody's perfect and so am I.. I made mistakes on him too..we learned from each other and that's the best part of our journey..

   I would like to thank kuya DJ for sharing his wisdom..He enlightened my mind on this situation..I would also like to thank God for giving me strength handling this..It's a horrible situation to be in, but I passed through all of the circumstances. :)

B.I.O campaign

I watched tyra show one time and they tackled about the B.I.O campaign...It's the "Beauty Inside and Out Campaign"..I'm a big fan of Tyra for her advocacies and this one is my favorite...She made me feel that beauty is something that comes from within..One is beautiful if she feels beautiful. True beauty is not something that meets the eye..True beauty is from the deep side of ourselves...Outer beauty is a reflection of what's inside of us... So, let us make a good reflection to define the true beauty!

My B.I.O (Beauty Inside and Out) Pledge:
     I will start my pledge with myself..I will bring this idea through all of my life...I'll do my best not to be judgemental with the physical beauty and not to be insecure..Contentment and good pride is a better choice to do. From now on, I will be confident to face the mirror with a great smile,accepting me for being me...I will love every details that makes up the real angel...
    I will share this to others by blogging some articles about true beauty...I'll also suggest to read articles in the internet or books or watch true beauty reality show that tackles about the true essence of beauty..stop spending time watching much of magazines or other media that will just brought up insecurities...Do much of something that will inspire you and will make you a better one..Start spreading the B.I.O campaign...!

pain is temporary and the lessons it leaves are lasting!

certain things come to our lives, not to make us weak and hopeless but to make us even stronger and more determined!That's what i've learned this week..pain is temporary and the lessons it leaves are lasting..Hope other people may feel the same way too...;)

There was a one person who have been a part of my life for more than a year...I've heared a lot of stuffs about him but I didnt mind most of them..He made me believe about certain things..I'm so glad that i did the right choice..I didnt gave him my full trust and sympathy. Coz' in the end,,my friends' thoughts are true...

kiefer ravena

I just knew kiefer ravena after watching his game in studio 23...he's so good in playing basketball...He's a high school student from ateneo blue eagles..I was so inspired with him and i'm hoping to see him in personal soon..I swear that I will support him in his upcoming games..I've heared that he'll be a part of Philippine National Basketball team known as Smart Gilas...go kiefer!you have my back..

baby justan:)))))))))

NOT-NOO!!!!!!:D

                                                           

                           Bloopers                                                                Correct Word/s

Jon Rey                   stablish                                                                 stabilize

                                spapageti                                                            spaghetti

                                esapageti                                                            spaghetti

                                flag ceremeno                                                    flag ceremony

                                taga laing gawas                                                taga gawas

                                karapatin                                                            karapatan

Jude                        iwan-init                                                              uwan-init

                                hagod taribitusin                                                hagod rubitusin

                                CSG                                                                     SSG

                                saesji(3x)                                                            SSG

                                waiting shed                                                       covered walk

                                vocationist                                                          vocalist

                                scientific notitation                                            scientific notation

                                labi                                                                      lab high

Gerald                    toas daku                                                              toa sa covered court

                                karapan                                                                karapatan

                                hubag-hubag                                                        hubog-hubog

                                combert                                                                convert

                                extam                                                                    exam

JB                            blooperds                                                             bloopers

                                tawhani                                                                tawhana

                                Henado                                                                 Nehado

                                prong king                                                            prom king

                                protesta                                                               propeta

                                next tik                                                                next week

                               

Francis                  ang basa na basa                                                  ang bag nabasa

                                da dyes                                                                alas dyes

                                formura                                                               formula

Nimitz                   cortetto                                                                  cornetto

                                propesta                                                              propeta

                                retot                                                                    rotate

                                kamort                                                                kamot

                                scientitic                                                            scientific

                                tiwashun                                                            tiwasun

                                sikty-nine                                                           sixty- nine

                                2nd floor                                                            part 2

                                sound seffects                                                   sound effects

                                USIBI                                                                  USB

                                presedento                                                        presedente

                                olection                                                             election

                                suffer field                                                        soccer field

                                han am egg                                                      ham and egg

                                hawt                                                                 heart

                                leply                                                                  reply

Gerard                     rupon                                                                 motor

                                pag homi                                                           pag himo

                                hina-hunaa                                                       huna-hunaa

Juric                       de bola                                                                bola

                              bangag sa tanod, isud sa tahi                            isud sa bangag sa dagom

Evans                    victory bell                                                           victory ball

                             aring                                                                     ering

                             ilo                                                                          iro

                             accreditators                                                         accreditors

                               

Frisian                   magnect                                                               magnet

                              magneto                                                               magnetic

                              serano                                                                  serado

                              sandweych                                                           sandwich

                              sparke                                                                  sparkle

                              story tolling                                                          story telling

Noriel                    stopagetti                                                             spaghetti

               

Masing                  skarkle                                                                  sparkle

                              ako rang ule padong usa                                      ako rang usa padong ule

                              not-noo?                                                               nindot no?

Ace                        prepric                                                                  perfect

Ashley                  bak blag                                                               black bug

Shara                     daut Don                                                             da Don

Jeah                       kayapas                                                               kapayas

                              huba't hubod                                                       hubo't hubad

Mark                     talikid                                                                    takilid

Angelie                 part floor                                                              part 2                 

                               

Please stop blaming ME

          Our yaya is really setting my temper up! She was blaming me today about the color of the paint in the other room. I just suggested a color, so please stop blaming me...The room turned dark and she was repeating  it over and over and over and over again...ahhhh!! She was saying that it was a wrong pick. I hate when somebody blame over me...Wise people dont blame because they knew that past is past. And those things cannot be gained back.  She was saying that it was baduy!dah,,,,I conclude your not wise...
 Im sorry for being mean...:(

Forget about the price tag(Aint bout the cha-ching-cha-ching/aint about the ba-bling-bling)

       It was a pure wednesday. As usual, I wake up at 8:00 am and prepare for  my class at 9:00. Wednesday is a rest day in our campus and so we are not obliged to wear uniform(except in CAT). I play with fashion sometimes and I tried to dress up well one wednesday. It was the opening for the environmental program in our school.
 I wore a blue green,stripe, 3/4 boyfriend sleeve that wednesday. It was the first time that I wore that sleeve but it was hunged in my cabinet for months.  I tucked it in with my red cute belt paired with dark skinny jeans and flip flop. I faced at the mirror several times before leaving.

       I walked confidently as I rode on the bus. The back seats were empty so I decided to sit there. There was no other passenger on my back that time. I enjoyed listening in my iPod until I realized,,,,,,,...I still have the tag on my back.! I forgot to get and throw the tag on my sleeve. It doesnt have a normal and usual size of a tag. It's quite big. Haha...I  tried to pull it off immediately  but it's hard(harder than you think). So I hid it on my back through my collar. I really cant imagine if somebody saw and caught me with the tag on my back. It will make me look like a "walking manikin" trying to sell a sleeve. Laugh at me..:)
         I still keep that unforgettable tag. It reminds me that I was once tagged at the bus.

I'm a Big Fan

03/03/11

      My study sched today was disturbed by the america idol. I cant resist not to watch the show. The girls are really good, especially the last four peformers. Some of my fave's are Lauren, Thia, and the former make-up artist(I forgot her name). Steven Tyler told Lauren that she is the best(She has a natural gift of talent). Thia has a very good quality of voice. And the last perfomer(the one that I forgot the name) had the first standing ovation in the season 10.
      All of them are really talented. I hope they'll get the spots. I feel so honored hearing and watching them performing. They gave me goose bumps on their outstanding performances. Hope to see them again on stage. I'm a big fan!
 

Eureka! I found the best acoustic place in the world!

        One night, I went to the atm room to get some cash for our js expenses. While the withdrawal is on process, I tried to sing a song since Im just alone inside. hehe.I was surprised how my voice transformed. The atm room is a good acoustic place. I sang in the rehearsal room at our school, in the bathroom, in the corner of my room, in the kitchen, and everywhere, but I conclude that atm room is the best acoustic place in the world.

Chao Juan!

March 2, 2011

      

           This week is our final examination in highschool. I can now count the number of days of my stay in our school with my fingers and toes. I will soon look for my "toga"..hahai. I cant imagine. Hmmmmmm,,stop imagining. I still have many things to face and to survive on before thinking about graduation. I need to study!study!study! This is my last chance to stretch my grade.
           Presently, I am studying my notes for my exams tomorrow. We're loaded.as in. I just want to post that it is really really tiring to study an "INCOMPLETE NOTES" right?..It's one of the main reason why I dont bother to study at all. I hope this attitude of mine will change in college. hehe. But no matter how I force myself to stop studying for the exams, my conscience prevails. My Id and Ego are always fighting.... Natural Moral Law? Do good and avoid evil. Laziness is evil, and so I should avoid to do it..."JUAN'S SOUL" should leave in my body this exam week. Good luck to me and to exypnos (esp on organic chem)hehe:)

 

BYE-BYE!

           Last night, I and my little cousins were watching a movie from Thailand entitled "Crazy lilltle thing called love". It was a very cute movie. There was a scene that Nam was ready to move as a M.3. The blackboard of their room was written with Bye-bye M.2. Since the language they use was not understandable, they were so busy reading the subtitle. All of us laughed out loud when one of my cousins read the word "Bye-bye" as in ( biye-biye)  instead of ( bay-bay ) Well, nobody's perfect.!

Jah forgive me, for I am a sinner.

           I don’t know when, where and how to start again. If I were to turn back the time, I preferably choose to serve God zealously than to study diligently in school. I don’t have somebody to lean on and somebody whom I can talk to with my problems. It’s really the hardest thing that I’ve ever experienced in my life.
 It’s hard for me being compared with my co-youth in the congregation. We were baptized at the same time but they are now more trained and more spiritually active in serving God. No matter what happen, serving God is the highest profession and the most important responsibility a man can do. This June 2011, I will be a 2 year-old publisher. And I know in myself that I didn’t grow that much. I admit that I took the time for granted. The time flashed so quickly and I was blinded with so many not important things. I didn’t notice that I was wasting too much time with school works. I felt so much guilt with my actions. And my conscience makes me cry all the time.
 I skipped a lot of meetings and preachings because of school works and activities. Honestly, it’s really not that easy to be a student in the laboratory high school.  I face too much pressure and too much headaches in my stay in our school. Our life is much different in national high schools. Most of the national high schools have 8 subjects. This fourth year, we have 14 subjects, almost twice as much with the subjects of the national high schools. Our schedule is loaded and we don’t have any vacant time from Monday to Friday. Friday is scheduled to be our midweek. And our last subject in Friday happened to end on 5:30 or 5:45. It’s also hard to ride immediately in going home since it is Friday. Mostly, I arrive at the house almost 6:30. My lola always left me because the midweek starts at 6:00 pm. Every Friday, I always go to Sogod to ride a bus via Bato but I always fail to catch the last trip. My cousins always share feedbacks about me and that turned me down so much. I always feel ashamed every time I face to brothers and sisters. I’m afraid on what they might be saying about me.
 I can’t deny that I always compare myself with my co-youth. They are now too far compared to me and the blame is all on me. After the session on Sundays, I always felt hard to talk comfortably with them. They tackle with their fun experiences together. I get jealous at times because I don’t have many moments that we’ve bonded together. Though it is with sadness that we don’t get to bond together always, I appreciate a lot how they reach to mingle with me. I am a person who is “kuhitonon pa” and my co-youth do their best to communicate with me. I will cherish them forever. They are role models to all youths. 
 I really wanted to talk with the elders or to the brothers and sisters all the time, but the fear takes over me. I was thinking that it may be awkward talking with them about this problem. I don’t have that close relationship to the brothers and sisters. School works and my shyness became a hindrance for me to mingle with them. I really wanted to build a bridge to them but I don’t know why I can’t make it. I always ask Jehovah to pour on me the Holy Spirit that may guide and give knowledge in my journey of serving Him.
 In the end of March, I will graduate in high school and I will leave the province. Soon, I will be transferred to Paso de blas congregation. And I will serve Jehovah at my very best and follow the footsteps of Jesus. The end is near and every second is important. I should not waste the time and my strength of my youthful life.
 I’ll be attending college this June. But I’m still thinking to stop a year. I want to take time serving God ardently. I want to build and grow first spiritually before attending in college. College is full crazy things and temptations. And I want to prepare myself to protect my spirituality. If Ill not be granted with my family on this decision, I will do my best to balance study and spirituality. And I must not seek first other things over serving Jehovah. Today, I ask nothing but a peaceful mind to decide aptly.
 In times of my weakness, I know Jehovah is the first one that I should call on to. And I hope this confession proves that I sincerely apologize for my deeds. I may didn’t do the right balance but I know it’s never too late to start again.

Yaya,,stop!

            Sometimes I get annoyed with our yaya because she used to shout when talking to somebody. I always feel shocked when her mouth starts to opeN. ahhhh...She says bad words all the time. She brings negative vibes to the home..hehehe:D..But she's a good yaya after all. She cleans the house diligently and wakes up early in the morning..peace yaya!!:D